Good luck...

I have a good bit to write about today so this will be a rather long post I think.  This is your fair warning and an understanding if only the bored and my mom make it through to the end.

I have quite a bit to catch up on.  I can not remember which day was which exactly, but here is the rundown of what I have been up to.  One afternoon we started out going to the grandmother of the family that feeds me.  Like any good grandmother she set out a feast of sweets and treats for us.  I ate until I wasn’t hungry ha.  She gave us sweet croissants, ice cream, fresh strawberries and raspberries, fresh cream, milk, chocolate waffle snacks, and several other things that were really good.  I played with the kids for a little while here and then we went to the local swimming pool.  It was very nice, they had a really fun water slide and some other little apparatuses.  I learned Germans are not shy.  They strip down wherever and especially with the kids, they let them run around naked anywhere.  On Saturday I went with a lady from the church here to some kind of 20^th anniversary of a volunteer program they have in Leipzig.  The day before had been the hottest day of the year, so I expected more of the same kind of weather.  It was not to be.  I wore shorts and luckily took a light sweater jacket but was still freezing during the day.  It turned out to be a pretty nice day.  It was kind of like a camps reunion where everyone was reuniting and seeing old friends so I was kind of the new guy who didn’t know anyone.  Add to this fact that I couldn’t really communicate with many of them and it was a bit awkward in the beginning.  I didn’t want to follow the lady around like a puppy all day so I kind of just wandered around for a little while.  Leo(the lady) finally introduced me to a group of friends because they were gonna give me a ride home later.  A few of them spoke ok English so I was able to talk with them some as the day went on, although I felt a bit awkward at times just standing there all day not having any idea what they were talking about.  I would have liked to stay in touch with a few of them, but none of them have Facebook! For dinner that night we had bratwursts on little rolls, I expect to eat this meal plenty this year. 

On Sunday I went to church in the morning.  A girl I found out later was the pastors wife came and translated for me, which was nice.  I hung out with Verona and her family during the day and I think that afternoon we went to the zoo.  It was pretty nice.  I think the Birmingham zoo is larger and has more animals and all but it was not as disappointing as the circus in France was.  Ask me if you don’t know what Im talking about.  This week I have been working in the kindergarten in the mornings and then coming back for an afternoon German lesson and then eating dinner a little later.  Kindergarten here has been very interesting.  I talk and play with the kids using the few German words I know and try to learn more by asking them what everything is.. they seem to like me ok ha.  I think the next great reality show should be taking the German kindergarten teachers and swapping them with some American teachers.  It would be funny.  The German children seem to be allowed to do almost whatever as long as its not fighting with another kid.  They can use scissors and glue and any other art supply whenever they like even if the teachers are in the other room. They climb and hang off all kinds of places.  I was pushing some kids on a big swing thing where several could sit in it at once which was connected to the horizontal bar above by two chains in a triangle formation.  As I was pushing the kids, two of them, one on each side, began hanging on the chains and doing all kinds of flips and acrobatics.  We were above a cement ground and I could really see it ending badly if they fell.  The other teachers didn’t seem to mind though so I didn’t either.  On the way to the playground the kids are also allowed to run on ahead or bring up the rear as they like.  I guess theres not too many places for the kids to go except outside or back to their class, but its definitely not like having to be single filed and quiet. I also eat lunch with the kids everyday.  They all know they must be quiet during lunch and use forks, spoons, and knives as they please.  They are quite good with the utensils though.  Better than most 4 and 5 years olds I think.  After lunch they all strip down to their underwear, boys and girls, for naptime.  This is when I leave.  The kids are all really funny as most children that age are.  There is one who reminds of the kid from Willy Wonka, he might be my favorite.

I cant remember eating too many different things since the last time I wrote.  Dinners are almost always a variant of bread and maybe a few vegetables and cheese and butter, sometimes leftovers from lunch.  I did have pumpkin soup the other day which wasn’t terrible.  I also had these potato and flour balls with goulash on top which was pretty good.  The meals at the kindergarten are not very good unfortunately.  Todays was the first one I really liked. We had boiled potatoes, cucumber salad, and scrambled eggs. 

I am ready to move to Chemnitz I think.  I would like to be able to really unpack and get settled in.  Here I am living out of one suitcase( Im afraid my big one wont shut again if I open it here) and its getting kind of old.

I have found that when you cannot understand the language being spoken, one has quite a lot of free time to think to one’s self.  Its like when you are reading in a noisy place and you are able to tune everything out and focus only on what is being read, except here its much easier because it’s all a bunch of gibberish anyways so you don’t catch a word here or there to distract you.  Now, this very reason for having so much time to think is both a blessing and a curse per se.  It is a blessing because the usual excuses and distractions from focusing on God are almost completely gone.  I cant understand the tv, radio, or other people so theres not much point in “wasting time” (as if when its in English its not wasting time) and things are not nearly as fun when you cant communicate with people around you, or when it takes quite an effort to get any idea across.  There are few if any outside influences that distract my thoughts from God.  I live in a church, eat meals with a family whose mother works in the church, work in the kindergarten in the mornings, and hang out with the family or in the church.  I am not vulnerable to all of the tv shows, music, commercials, etc. that once you get away from it, you realize carries a lot of trash.  However, having so much time to think to oneself can easily be flipped into a bit of a curse.  Although it is great for me to not be distracted by so many things that are usually easy to find and take my time and now focus on God more, it is also easier for me to focus on the very things that so many people escape from with tv, radio, or other people.  It is easy for me to focus on not being able to speak the language yet and worry about what the heck am I going to do for a year here and if Ill miss my family and friends and so on and so forth.  When I begin to do this, being alone with your thoughts is more of a nightmare than a nice study/vacation/work year in Germany.  Recently my dad spoke at church, and although I didn’t attend, I was told he spoke about going through trials and this making you stronger.  How we should embrace trials that God sends our way as a kind of learning and growing time.  Along with my thoughts about my free time, I have also contemplated this idea which I definitely agree with.  I believe they are closely related and in another way than just seeing my time here as just a trial or hard time.  Well, maybe they are kind of a stepping stone to where I am going.  I think that in my time here, especially while I learn the language, I must keep my eyes on Jesus and focus on God’s will and his love for me and let every worry go to the wayside.  I think that when we go through trials it is easiest for us to go to God and focus only on him.  When we are hurting and at our worst or really struggling, these are the times it is easiest for us to quit relying on ourselves and go to God and let him take over for us.  We finally realize in these times that we aren’t sufficient and so we go to God to help us through our troubles.  Its in these times we keep our focus on God and allow him to take over our lives and in return are filled with so much love and peace.  I do not really consider my time here a struggle, definitely not as much as I know others are experiencing.  I think that many people, however, (myself included) tend to ignore and/or escape so much of life on a daily basis instead of remaining focused on God.  I have realized how difficult it can be to keep your thoughts focused towards God and his will even when we get away from daily distractions.  I have also realized how difficult it can be even when you are away from distractions to face God and allow him to have his way in me.  I think it is much easier for myself and so many others to simply stay distracted until we hit the bottom.  Once we are there and really struggling, then it is easy to come to such a forgiving and graceful God and let him teach us and love us.  This will sound obvious, but we have to really keep our focus on God at all times.  The Bible is full of stories that we should be able to learn from(rather than experience for ourselves, although experience is the best teacher I suppose).  Peter walked on the water while he focused on Jesus but the minute he allowed himself to be distracted he began to sink. Walk by faith not by sight. Jonah got eaten by a whale when he got distracted by fears.  We have to fight both outward distractions and our own thoughts. NOT. (that was a “this shirt is black. Not. Joke fyi) We have to  keep our minds, hearts, and spirits on God and he will do the fighting for us.

The last thing I have been thinking about I may just leave as a question for now, well with a little explanation of my line of thinking.  Ive been wondering why do pastors get paid? When/how did that start? And why do they get paid more as they progress up the ladder as Superintendent or Bishop or whatever?  The last part is really what Ive wondered about.  Why do those in higher positions make so much money? Would it not be better if the church just took care of their pastors? I realize that by paying them that yes, this is taking care of them, but does anyone really need that much money? Sure its nice to have things but as Jesus told the rich man, its easier for a camel to go through a needle than for  him to go to Heaven.  I guess I don’t understand why or how pastors allow themselves to make so much money.  If they are called by God then they should trust Him to take care of their needs.  Their needs.  Not their wants necessarily.  When Paul came or sent others to churches in the Bible, that town provided for their needs.  I would think that at least a few pastors would feel a bit of guilt making so much money off of teaching to feed the poor and love your neighbor and then not giving away all of the excess money not needed for their needs.  I realize that I don’t know how pastors spend their money so maybe many of them do this already and I am unaware.  I also realize that pastors are humans too and it is easy to ignore the little feeling you get when you become aware of a homeless person or someone in need.  I also thought that maybe some would respond that you need to have competitive pay and some incentives to encourage people to answer their calling, or something along those lines.  I would think that if you didn’t, though, then we might have less people who are not as sincere or who become comfortable in their role as pastor. Meaning they will only remain pastors and clergy as long as they are really trusting God and certain that they are where God wants them, not just because it’s a comfortable job and they know the routine.  This is probably oversimplified and I know there are a ton of factors that go into someone becoming a pastor or whatever. I am also aware that it is rather easy to think you are being called somewhere and then find out you were wrong or it was really just you wanting something.

Anyways, if you made it this far Im impressed. I guess thats all for today ha.